12.19.2006

how happy the holidays


a long time ago.... in a nicu far, far away (well, a little over a year and just up lamar blvd).... Calli met her bff... her best friend for life... the one who would keep her in trouble... in lots of trouble... the mighty giadalicious. since that fateful day (actually, after they were released from nicu prison and we were out of rsv quarantine) they have been attached at the hip. i really think they "know" each other. they smile and get so excited when the other comes in the room.

now, both big and strong (you'd never know by looking at them just how fragile they once were) they decided to take on "the man." that's right people. the jolly one himself. the great santa. at the sluaghter and 35 whataburger of course.

they figured what better way to capture the memories of their first "real" christmas than on santa's lap. oh how they loved every minute. all they can talk about now is when they can see him again.

these girls put everything in the right perspective. "just play and all is good."

the definition of "man" has been re-written?

what make a man? is it six feet in height and 180lbs of raw muscle? (thank you very much hollywood) or is it found in the relentless pursuit for your families safety? you be the judge.

my neighbor called to inform me that he had to kill a scorpion in his house. shit... shit... how many times does one man's "manhood" have to be tested before he's a man? i mean, how do i approach the situation, i'm obviously afraid of, when both my girls are around to witness my pussness? will i be able to produce like a "real" man? will i expose my girly side and scream? will the scorpion win?

(lightbulb above the head illuminates) score!!!

in the middle of my panic i remember a friend and fellow father-in-the-making had to deal with this same issue. i have provided his priceless advice.

I surveyed the area, made sure Gio and Giada were safe and then grabbed a shoe. I then approached with caution until I could strike. I looked that scorpion in the eye and made it say it's final goodbye. At that moment, I struck with the sole of that shoe..... and missed. What kind of husband/father misses the deadly scorpion in front of his family!!! Disgraced, I followed the scorpion until I struck it with enough blows that the swiffer would make easy work of it and just like that, the scorpion was dead and my pride restored... kind of.

Since this was obviously not the best approach for a number of reasons, we called in the terminator. It was expensive but I did not fine too many that were cheaper.

We use Bulwark and they spray every 2 months and come back for free if we still see them. it was around $400 a year. expensive but cheaper than getting bit or ruining any more of my shoes. : )

John


well, it's nice to see i'm not alone. i hope this advice will help the many "men" across the world just like me.

thanks john.

in conclusion, i have studied the facts provided and still believe a man is defined by hollywood. shit. well, that's life. at least we have something to strive for right?

12.13.2006

one step... at a time... AND BEYOND(insert echo effect)

it looks like parenting isn't going to stop at me changing diapers and 430am bottles. no, that would be too easy. which leads to me removing my ass from the couch, setting aside my bar-tool and (gulp) getting a day job. the one thing i've been avoiding since age 18. i'm not exactly devistated by this just wondering where my life is headed. but not knowing is half the battle, right.

fuck that!

who wants to sit in an office and answer the phone for eight hours a day? well, i guess i do. you know, i sound a bit negative right now. i don't want to send the wrong message. i did choose to take the job. i had other options. i did turn them down. but damn, taking that first step is the hardest. how does one make the move into adulthood (at age 31) as smooth as possible? i guess you shut-up, grab your ass and run with it.

being a community player can't be all that bad.

i knew when it was time i would know it. and it's here. and i'm ready to be the best damn dad i can. day job and all.

12.08.2006

the first year -- in a moment -- and that's a small well packed moment

here goes nothing... let the blogging begin.

ok so, we're a couple of weeks into the second year of callia frances' life and i still have to take a deep breath when thinking of all that has happened. to say her first year has been a challenge would be... um... a bit of an understatment.

for starters, our "little angel" broke her silence two months early. for those of you not counting that put us at thirty-two out of forty week birth. Now, quite a bit of weight is gained in the last weeks of the pregnancy so our bundle of joy busted out just shy of 4lbs. and that landed us in the nicu for month one. spending the first month of your first child's life in the hospital will make anyone step back and appreciate every moment. let's just say that we don't take anything for granted. the smiles, the cries, the late nights, the boom boom diapers all keep us going. it's not to say that frustration doesn't set in from time to time but i assure you it doesn't last long.

so, we're two days away from calli's first christmas and we get the green light to get the hell out of that sterile hole we affectionately call home. with calli in-tow, my wife and i stare at one another... "should i drive? How do i drive? she won't fall out, right? can we take a nurse home?" and we were off to start our new life. holy crap... what do we do now?

a couple of good months go by. we're rockin' -n- rollin'. doing the parent thing when all of sudden the cries get longer... and louder. so i listen closer... and then... closer. what???

it burns when you pee.

what the hell is bladder reflux?

there's nothing like valentines day at the childrens ward. damn it! can't we get a break.

fast forward to april 2006 and we are the happiest family on earth! "what's that? rsv season is over? woohoo! get us the hell outa this 700sqft cage.

man we went everywhere. finally we had a life again. with a baby. we're parents. this is cool.

they all say time flies when you have a child but i had no idea. you start living through their milestones and it does start to go by; too fast. she's smiling, sitting up, rolling over, crawling, pulling up, cutting teeth, cutting teeth, damn... cutting teeth, saying daddy. (well not really but i can dream right?) anyway next thing you know you're planning a first birthday. and what a party. there were babies everywhere. cake flying, toys taking over, and enough flash photography to blind you for a decade. i hope i recorded enough. shit, these videos will be the barometer for what kind of dad i am. shit, what's enough.

then the 2nd's start. "awwwwe, it's her 2nd thanksgiving. oh, remember your birthday last year in the hospital. i can't wait for christmas ."

who would believe our daughter who can't stop smiling. who can't stop talking. who can't stop growing. was ever premature. we are so lucky to have calli in our lives and we will never take a moment of her life for granted.