let sleeping babies lie?

"they" always say to keep the child out of your bed. which makes great sense on paper. if they get too attached they'll want to sleep in your bed all the time. yeah, i get it. but at 345 in the am i (or normally my wife) find it hard to just walk around holding a 25lb toddler till she falls asleep again. if she gets in our bed, she generally hits rem sleep within seconds then moves back to her own bed. no big deal, case closed everyone back to sleep by 4am. cool? well, i started thinking differently the last couple of days. she has been in our bed when the alarm sounds and i wonder how comfortable is she with this?

my daughter is smart. i don't say that as some kind of declaration to show how that's my doing. i say that because it just hit me and now i'm really scared. she gets what's going on around her and i can see the wheels of manipulation turning at all times. she knows where she has us and how to use that to her advantage. which brings me back to the sleep thing. how long before she wakes up and has to finish out the night in our bed? without even knowing. the natural, unconscious instinct to cry and continue to cry till she gets what she wants. her little mind has started putting 2 & 2 together and understanding everystep of the way. i just hope this doesn't happen in her sleep.